Struggling, but Hopeful

 I have been quite off the rocker when it comes to school this semester, and this year in general. I feel like I've let down my professors, peers, and myself. To be honest, my mental health hasn't been in a great state. I really want to get back on track, but I often feel like I am drowning. I feel terrible that I've put others into bad positions. Still, I have to try. I think that I can still get on pace and do okay, and I am putting in the work to do so. I know that I put myself into this position, and it is up to me to dig myself out of it. I am eternally grateful to the help I have received from others, and that is the only reason that I can see myself getting through this. I just need to push myself a little more, and hopefully then I'll be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm hoping that I can end this semester on a strong note, and put myself in a position to succeed after this semester is over. Until then, I will be grinding my work as hard as I can. 

Thats all folks

 Done and done. At this point, I'm happy it's done. I want to explore my game more. As much as I wanted to I didn't finish it technically. There aren't a lot of specifics that were finished but the game is playable in its current state and it's fun. I think this could actually be a cool thing for teachers in the museum studies program across the nation to use in an introduction class. There were a lot of ups and downs during this period and there were many stressful days. I am overall happy with the final product that I have created and I'm glad I chose to take this project down the path I took it. The project transformed so much since December and it ended up fantastic.

Getting off the Rollercoaster!

 Having submitted my final paper and presentation today, it truly feels like I am in the midst of getting off of a rollercoaster-- and I'm a bit sad that it's over! This has been such a wild ride, with forming an idea that has essentially been alive and evolving since I thought of it, and going to Brooklyn, which was an experience I am forever grateful for. As a result of this project, I have learned so much about KAWS and about myself, and what I am capable of. With my undergraduate studies coming to a close, it all feels very bittersweet, and as I move onto new adventures in the future, I will always remember what the Museum Studies program has given me.

Here is a quote from Michelangelo that I saw the other day:

"Every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it. ”

While I am in no way comparing my thesis to the masterpieces of Michelangelo, I definitely feel as though I accomplished carving my vision from the marble it was hidden within.

What Do I Do Now?

 It feels really weird to be finished with my thesis. This time tomorrow, all of my final edits will be done and submitted. I'm really not sure how I feel about it. On one hand, this marks the end of my undergraduate experience. I'm not going to graduate school in the fall, so I'm done with college for a little bit. I feel empty knowing that I don't really have any large projects going on.

On the other hand, it's really nice to know that I now have a large amount of free time and that I can use it for whatever I want. I didn't realize how much time I was spending working on my thesis until the work finally began to wind down. I'm not really sure what to do with all of this extra time now. 

Thesis Complete!

 Hello Everyone! 

I can't believe my thesis is finally complete. It was a quiet journey of both great and hardship. I can tell that my work has evolved since last semester. There were some times that my work had some barriers and needed to change. But looking back now, I can say I am very proud of my work. I remember  I decided to change my major to Museum Studies; one of the requirements was a Senior Thesis Course.  I was horrified having to write over 20 pages. Now I know I can do it. I have a couple of things I need to revise then I will be officially done. 

Can't Believe It!

 I honestly can't believe I made it. Thinking back on this process I can say that I have grown as a writer and student. I was always so nervous to think about writing such a big assignment and now that I am finished I am so proud of myself. Having put the final touches on my paper and the video I am very happy to be done but know that if I had to do it again I know now that I can.

Almost towards the finish line.

Hello everyone!

We are so close to being done! It has been a wild ride!! My next challenge is to put together my video for the capstone. I haven't many experiences with editing. Also, I need to figure out a way to record myself and have an interpreter voice for me at the same time. I have hopes that the video will turn out fine. 

Phew!

 Having submitted my full draft last week, I can now look back and really evaluate the process of how I reached this point. Thinking of August and September of last year, I remember wanting to write something about the Impressionists and their effect on Art History, but I also knew that I should step out of my comfort zone, and expose myself to new ideas and works. Moving into the world of contemporary art (and KAWS) was really different for me, and I definitely had to adjust my thinking, but I am so excited about the opportunities and lessons my research has given me.

In terms of moving forward, I am looking forward to the final adjustments and tweaks that I will make to the final thesis, and also to finalizing my video presentation. While this is all very exciting, I do realize that my time in the Museum Studies program is coming to a close, making everything very bittersweet. Having said that, I will do my best to fully take in the next three and a half weeks, and if I'm lucky, I may even think of a title for my thesis!

Nearing the End

 Having just turned in the final draft, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Now I just need to make small revisions to finalize it and will be done! I have completed the video presentation aspect also. It feels so great to be so close to the end and have everything completed!

(S)Printing to the Finish Line

I know that I still have a lot of writing to refine and flesh out, but it's really nice to be finished with the project portion of my thesis. There is something really nice about having a physical, tangible reflection of the work that I have put in this semester that makes things seem less stressful. I think a lot of what makes things less stressful is knowing that there isn't much writing to do, and I need to finish refining things and adding additional sources to help support what I'm writing about. 

With the full draft due next week, I'm pretty hopeful that I will actually be able to have everything done without too many issues. It's also very cool and satisfying to have 3D printed letters on my desk now. They're a fun decoration to have, and they hopefully serve as the start to a nice collection of memorabilia related to projects and papers. 

Here is an image of me printing with the letters that were recreated.

New developments

 So this week I had a meeting with my advisors. It was helpful and productive and pointing me in the direction I need to be going in this last week of work, but it seems like something that should have been done earlier. Up until this point I had met with both my advisors once before, but I had met with them individually a few times throughout the semester. I was thinking that they liked the game and what I was doing and that the biggest problem was that I wasn't identifying the purpose well enough in my paper. This week they said that my game doesn't reflect how a museum works well and I knew that was true, but I was trying to focus on a few key points and keep it very simple so it could be played in all sorts of learning environments. I don't think it will be that big of a deal because I have a lot of ideas, but it was very confusing to me especially since most of the professors keep saying to narrow the project down and to reduce the scope. Now I'm aiming at remaking the game for museum studies maybe, I just wish I didn't have these thoughts a week before our final submission is due. Hopefully, it turns out well.